i was reading emails and blogs today.
and i found a line i really like. hmmmmmm
"Men are haunted by the vastness of eternity. And some ask ourselves: Will our actions echo across the centuries?
Will strangers hear our names long after we are gone, and wonder who we were, how bravely we fought, how fiercely we loved?"
and i can't help but smile.
i wonder.
we all need to leave something behind when we're finally gone.
in our soul of souls, in our heart of hearts, we know that we long to be remembered long after we are gone. it's the only way we get to believe that our life is not just some passing breeze.
...that we are not living, just because we have to.
we want to believe that we are watched... so that even after we're gone, we remain... be it in someone's memory, or in somebody's heart.
i wonder.
what would i like to be remembered for?
hmmmm.
and i'm smiling now because i think i know my answer to that question.
i finally understood that i, sometime before last night, had fallen over the precipice i promised never to fall into again.
i did not know.
but after last night, i realized i had already let go and jumped without meaning to. i thought i was just leaning over the edge and looking down.. checking to see if it was safer this time.
but i already jumped. it's already starting to hurt.
sigh. ..to feel so much that it already starts to hurt. and i am petrified.
i think i know what's going to happen to me when i reach the bottom. and i think i know how sad, how crazy, and how painful it will be.
but faith. faith.
he said he's going to break my fall. faith. faith.
i jumped and believed... scared to death, but did anyhow.
this would be worth it. this one is worth taking that risk. my heart somehow knows it would be.
so it's faith, he says. i just need to have faith. to just confidently believe that when i do reach the bottom, he'll be there like he said he would.
and my happily-ever-after comes true.
Dont you let go of me - Ilse De Lange No solid ground, no relief to be found No promises, no demands, no depending Silence, no rules, no bending No mystery There's only you
I live inside an empty room that's now inside my head And everywhere and all around, only your arms that I feel Don't you let go of me
No comfort, no words and no ending Solitude, I am tired of pretending Still There's only you
I live inside an empty room that's now inside my head And everywhere and all around, only your arms that I feel Don't you let go of me The ceiling high, the walls are wide, no floor beneath my feet Nowhere to go, nowhere to be and you're still all that I see Don't you let go of me
Be quiet, maybe you can hear my heart Be quiet, maybe you won't break me apart It's all down to you It's all down to you It's all down to you It's all down to you It's all down to you
I live inside an empty room that's now inside my head And everywhere and all around, only your arms that I feel Don't you let go of me The ceiling high, the walls are wide, no floor beneath my feet Nowhere to go, nowhere to be and you're still all that I see Don't you let go of me
You're still all that I need Don't you let go of me
hahahaha... good entry.. as requested by my dear sister, write more often ka diay ha?? hahahahhaha!!! :D
hmmmm.... i don't know. i guess not. are u mad now yan??? hahaha kidding. ^^
in a way, i could say yes. i wouldn't be able to see her whenever i want to now. wala sya sa elizabeth pond. wala pud sya sa it park. but missing her so much? i guess not.
it's like, when she left for bulgaria, there was a tinge of sadness there for not having her here anymore. but days have passed, and i guess i do not feel like she is gone at all. it's not just because we can communicate over ym everyday, or i know what's happening with her life still over her blog.
but i think that.... when you love someone as much as i love my sister deanne, you'll realize that no matter how far that person may go, may it be on the other side of the world, she will always, always be with you.
here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
and whatever happens... wherever deanne may be, she will always be a part of me. and i know that i, and all the rest of us, will always be a part of her.
that is a bond, not distance nor time, could ever break.
i found a chapter of one of kahlil gibran's books. this one is all about love. hmmmm...
And he raised his head and looked upon the people, and there fell a stillness upon them. And with a great voice he said: When love beckons to you follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you. And when he speaks to you believe in him, Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.
For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning. Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun, So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth. Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself. He threshes you to make you naked. He sifts you to free you from your husks. He grinds you to whiteness. He kneads you until you are pliant; And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.
All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart. But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure, Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor, Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself. Love possesses not nor would it be possessed; For love is sufficient unto love.
When you love you should not say, "God is in my heart," but rather, I am in the heart of God." And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course. Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires: To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night. To know the pain of too much tenderness. To be wounded by your own understanding of love; And to bleed willingly and joyfully. To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving; To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy; To return home at eventide with gratitude; And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.
She can kill with a smile She can wound with her eyes She can ruin your faith with her casual lies And she only reveals what she wants you to see She hides like a child, But she's always a woman to me
She can lead you to love She can take you or leave you She can ask for the truth But she'll never believe And she'll take what you give her, as long as it's free Yeah, she steals like a thief But she's always a woman to me
Oh--she takes care of herself She can wait if she wants She's ahead of her time Oh--and she never gives out And she never gives in She just changes her mind
And she'll promise you more Than the Garden of Eden Then she'll carelessly cut you And laugh while you're bleedin' But she'll bring out the best And the worst you can be Blame it all on yourself Cause she's always a woman to me
Oh--she takes care of herself She can wait if she wants She's ahead of her time Oh--and she never gives out And she never gives in She just changes her mind
She is frequently kind And she's suddenly cruel She can do as she pleases She's nobody's fool And she can't be convicted She's earned her degree And the most she will do Is throw shadows at you But she's always a woman to me
