burnt out

i'm too stressed out. i know that it's the way it's supposed to be but after a year of not working and then going back to it, i feel like things are going too fast. i can't concentrate and i don't know how to deal with it.

i was absent today. my body hurts, it doesn't really hurt as much to cause me to not show up for work. but my mind hurts too. the worrying parts of me are slowly eating away everything i usually cherish during my waking hours. and i hate waking up in the morning. things are never going to be like they were before and i'm just sick of it. sick of it, i tell you. even my husband wonders why i get so frustrated and angry nowadays. i never had been good at coping.. i want to just forget everything else.

happy-go-lucky me can't be happy-go-lucky anymore when i no longer know how to hold myself and my life in place. i need to be with my daughter. and i need time for myself without having to think of my job, or my school work, or all of the people i need to do things for.

if i can only take my husband and daughter and run away from it all. but life is never that easy... and i'd still have to go through my days one at a time. bummer.

u moved me.Wednesday, October 27, 2010